The Uncomfortable Reality of Being A Woman - Nailah Brightman

sometimes i wear 

fitted clothes

to go to parties

most times a fitted top

with baggy jeans

the bagginess a safety net

for my body

to not be sexualized

but every time

i go out

im fearfully reminded

of the time 

these drunken men inconvenienced themselves

to ask me and my friends

if we needed a ride 

for twenty minutes that felt like an hour

i could hear my heart beat

as my friend held my hand

stepping in front of me

and yelling while

her index finger waved

in his face 

i was seventeen then

now as a nineteen year old

a lot of the time i wear

a baby tee

with some baggy jeans

my breasts hang freely under the tee

and my underwear brand shows

with a happy trail sitting above it

my favorite pale-yellow 

scarlet witch cropped tee

holds yet another memory of

a random guy continuously 

asking me to go out on a date

he had to know why i said no

and bang on my suite’s door

because my “no, thank you”

was apparently a yes 

still i don’t remember the last time

i wore a skirt

wearing the “girls” uniform 

for so many years in charter school

i wanted a break

from the performance

of femininity 

and the comfortability

to wear as i please

without the male gaze

following me everywhere i go

whether i tap into

my femininity or

my masculinity

my clothes should not

define my treatment

so, despite it all i still wear my 

happy trail freely

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Nailah Brightman is currently in her second year. She majors in English and minors in Film Studies. She’s a poet, chronic film lover, part-time photographer. She aspires to become a director; however, her visions do not stop there— and ARCH is just the first step. Follow her for more @naiologyy.