I Want To Do It Too - Benjamin Ruzala
I would not want to be cancelled!
(So why don’t we speak as bugs.
I can do it too.)
As you are so prone to do, you donkey-faced Weevil.
You are too late, little donkey-faced Weevil.
I have already portrayed you as you,
A sniveling, crying, donkey-faced Weevil!
And I, as the hard-working, hard-living, hard-boiled,
army ant.
You would have done it too if you spoke first.
Do not think you care more than me, Weevil,
I crawl and work around the ant hill just fine,
All you do is whine, and moan, and cry, and groan.
I am ready to die! Die! On a moment’s notice,
To our enemies the bees, our enemies the termites.
It’s not the dirt mound that matters; it’s the will to die on it.
I am a hard working army-ant, looking for His queen,
The ant queen of my dreams.
I do not have time
to look at your theories, your liberties.
Or your histories of tyrannies,
Your interpretations and evaluations.
And I can do it too.
And you do not have time,
You have no time at all,
You can’t even define an insect!
You will never get to unwind:
All the problems that you think we face.
You will never get to find:
All the solutions that you think,
we need.
Don’t try to fix! What gets me through my workday!
And if it all went down, you’d be just like me.
Don’t act like it’s untrue. When our enemies attack,
When our own leaders attack? When the world attacks?
When the ant-hill is awash, against the rain.
You will file in line just like I do,
And not take a single step, against the grain.
And I can do it too!
The Yellow Wasp-Paper is about the limits of feminine minds,
The Big Brother Beetle was a prophecy of the botched handling,
Of the Wolbachia Pandemic,
Of Lice and Men is about the army Ant loneliness epidemic!
The Blue Moths, nibbling on the curtains,
Are blue because of the bad things that blue-haired lesbians do!
And I can do it too!
Ant Farm? I believe on that one we agree.
Dorsal Vessel of Darkness is about the dire need,
And the beauty of worldwide maps,
That little kid in Those Who Worm Away From Omelas,
Should have picked himself up by His Bootstraps!
Dirt Mounds Like White Mice? The Horror the Horror
Will I find my Ant Queen?
Quoth the black field cricket “Nevermore!”
And I am doing it too,
A hard-working and solid,
Army ant, part of a crew,
Knows what he wants and knows what he needs,
And knows what he will do.
A strong six legs in the community,
This army ant. Part of a group!
Crawling through the tunnels,
Winding about the hill,
Marching in a parade,
Part of a group.
Whatever I do to you in an argument,
I promise that you would have done it to me first!
But I want to do it too,
An army ant in row,
With his ant-hill shift,
And his dirt-room,
And his rank and file,
And his co-working brothers,
His placement in line,
And his allotment in time,
And his loving and affirming queen.
More beautiful than you fucking donkey-faced weevils -
Have ever seen!
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Benjamin is a UAlbany Senior English Major, he loves to read anyone’s work, and it was his main reason for wanting to be an intern and editor for ARCH. He likes to write poetry more than prose and the main topic that he often finds himself writing about is bugs.